Tuesday, May 8, 2012

The New Rules of Informed Consent

Years and years and years ago, in a former life in this incarnation, I worked as an Emergency Medical Technician. I spent a lot of time on an ambulance going from person to person, situation to situation helping whomever called us to the best of my trained ability. In the medical field, in order to help someone, you must be given permission, either by a loved one or by the person themselves. This can only happen if the person is coherent, cognizant of their situation and surroundings, and aware enough to say yes, I want you to help me.  Okay, truth is they don't have to be that cognizant. They just have to say yes.

Now, in the special situation where someone is too drunk, too incoherent or completely unconscious and there is no one there to give consent, this becomes implied consent - the implication that if they were awake and aware enough, they would ask me to help them right now. Both types of consent are really important in the medical world. People are allowed to say no all the time, even if the situation is dire. (Actually, what happens then is you just wait for the person to pass out and then start helping them. They've just then given implied consent. We used to do that all the time when it was necessary because we wanted to help people and the assumption is people want to be helped when they are in their right mind.)

This has strangely found its way into the business of the spiritual world, as well. In the world of medical intuitives, mediums, psychics and intuitive writers, people are routinely trained to ask permission before going forth and giving any information they have. Most often this is easily done when someone pays the intuitive or simply makes an appointment - I suppose that's informed consent of some kind. Maybe even implied consent too. What it really is is a transaction that says I want to do business with you. But is this really consent? Because in the spiritual world, you never know what you're getting into.

But here is the big question: do we need to give and get permission? Or is simply both our presences there enough?

Let's say you're walking down the street. Whether you consider yourself intuitive or not, let's just use this situation as an example because not only has it happened to me, but I know many, many others who have had similar situations and not known what to do.

Okay, let's be real. Here's what happened to me, several years ago while I was on a trip to Victoria, BC: My parents and I took a 3-hour walking guided tour that cascaded us through the many streets of downtown Victoria, in and out of several amazing shops and up and down the many cultural avenues. While I was walking along, I got the sense something was with me. Something other than my guides and those who etherically travel with me regularly.

On a side note, many people ask, why do some people get visited and others do not? Because, you see, those of us who are open to our intuitive ability and focus upon it are seen differently in the spiritual world - we shine. We shine with a vibration that says I can see dead people.

Okay, just kidding.

But not really.

And because we're shiny in this specific way, the people on the other side can see this and are attracted to it because they know we can hear them and see them and get their message across. (For those who have a more unique experience where they have no interest in mediumship or channeling or anything like that and do have a spiritual encounter that changes their life, this is because they came forward into this lifetime with the consciousness and intention to be a spiritual conduit. Thus, the consent was given long, long ago.)

Back to the streets of Victoria. As I walked along, I began to understand who and what this presence was. It was the departed grandmother of a young woman walking in front of me. I kept feeling the nudge and beguiling presence of this older woman and all she wanted to do was talk with her beloved granddaughter one more time. I could see her clearly and still can to this day.

But I never got the courage to say something.

And you know why? Because I had been so deeply trained to get informed consent from others. Don't bother people. Don't be intrusive. Don't be wrong. All of these things had been deeply trained into me as a young person and reinforced as an adult in the medical world. Only offer hope or help to those who ask for it. So, what was I to do? This girl hadn't asked for my help. She hadn't even made eye contact with me all day. But there was someone who had given me permission - the ever-so-loving grandmother who had an incredibly loving message to share with her granddaughter - and I ignored it completely. And why? Because the grandmother was no longer in our physical world and somehow we have decided that consent is a physical thing.

For anyone who follows the understanding of the law of attraction, what we vibrate to is what we experience. This should then imply that what we are experiencing is what we have been putting out in the world through our very being. So, why is it that we've been trained to ask for consent when each of us is giving and getting consent all the time? The only difference is whether it's physical consent or spiritual.

Most of us know that nothing in the world that is really real - the spiritual world - is ever really hidden. All vibrations, all information, all connection is accessible and there for anyone who wants it. All of us, even those who feel they aren't intuitive at all, are getting information all the time through gut reactions, instincts, and how something or someone makes you feel. This is happening when you walk into a room and you feel the glorious energy of a party getting started. Or when you step into an empty stairwell and know that it's a bad idea. Or when you start thinking about your good friend and suddenly she calls you. Or when you walk into an office and know your boss has bad news for you. These are all things that you are getting through vibration and energetic communication.

But did you ask permission from each of those beings before you explored your feelings or theirs? Did you ask your boss' permission before you stepped into his office? Probably. Did you also ask permission to feel what he was emanating? I doubt it.

And why? According to the law and rules of implied and informed consent that even psychics and mediums follow, you should have. According to this outdated and antiquated idea about each of us being separate and having the right to our own space (which doesn't really work or apply to the spiritual world because we are all one, literally), we must turn off our ability to feel one another because otherwise, we're being intrusive.

And this is something we have already done. We have turned off our ability to feel the truth about one another so we don't intrude upon someone without their consent and they can't intrude upon us. Children get yelled at for picking up on the fact that a parent has told them a lie. They get in trouble and this makes them stop listening. Adults routinely get angry at one another when someone has intuitively picked up on a deeply hidden secret and respond with a resounding, "You don't know anything about me!" This then makes the person think they really did get it wrong. But did they? Do we really know everything about one another just through our intuition?

Oh, yes, we do.

Each and everyone of us.

Your big toe may be separate from your thumb, but they know each other intimately well. How can they not? They are of the same being. Just as we are all of the same energy.

I think we need a new set of rules about consent. And this starts with really understanding the law of attraction. What you put out, you get back. Simple. So, if you are vibrating in such a way because you've put out the intention that you want to experience something specific (consciously or sub-consciously), then that's what you'll experience.

At the time I was in Victoria, I was putting out the energy that I needed to get permission before intruding upon someone, no matter how much that message from that woman's grandmother would have helped her, and I was also putting out the energy of connection to spirits through my clairsentient and clairvoyant abilities. So the end result of what I got was a situation where a spirit came to me in an awkward situation where I became too afraid to help someone. And who did this serve? Well, certainly not the grandmother, nor the granddaughter. But in hindsight, it really did help me. It brought me to this understanding: create an intention for what you want to experience. Stop worrying about what others might think, how they might respond, or what they might say (the physicals and the non-physicals). Just do what you came here to do. Be a part of this world and stop worrying about social conventions.

I have since set up with my guides and the Angels that I want people in my life who want my help, clarity in what I receive, and a filter by them of only positive messages. No harm allowed. Setting this up in my vibration has given me the confidence to know that whatever comes out of my mouth, as long as I am listening to the Angels and their guidance, will be to the benefit of all, even the people not standing in the same room as us. This outmoded version of not wanting to burden someone who doesn't want our help or the help of their deceased loved one is not working for us because it would be like saying to your foot, stop walking forward. I didn't give you permission to help the rest of  my body.

We all work on conjunction and in concert with one another. That was how it was intended. And if your intention is to be here to help your greater self - the all that encompasses everyone - then don't hold back, don't be afraid, don't wait for them to come to you. Someone has already taken that step. There's a non-physical knocking at your door and trust me, they see the world in a way we are only beginning to understand. But if we don't bother to share that with one another, then all we'll do is stay exactly right where we are. And I, for one and for all, want to grow.

Questions for thought: 

Does the sun ask the earth if it's okay to shine? 

Do the flowers ask the soil if it is appropriate to grow? 

Does the forest ask the trees to grow in a certain place so that other trees are not bothered by one another's growing? 

Do lions ask the zebras for permission to hunt them? 

Do you really need permission to be who you are, no matter what that looks like? 


Sit with your arms safely by your sides. Allow your body to relax and your mind to roll inward. Breathe. Breathe in, breathe out. Know that you are safe. Your body is in the hands of Angels and you are safe to be here. You are safe right now. Breathe. Breathe in, breathe out. Relax your shoulders and release your muscles. Allow your body to finally relax. Just release. And breathe. Breathe in, breathe out. Good. Place your awareness right in the center of your heart. Feel your heart expand and open, allowing yourself to connect all your energies - your spiritual energy, your physical energy, your mindful energy. Connect them into unity by seeing or feeling them interweave and overlap. This is their true purpose, to be interwoven, not separate. Just as you are not separate from anything. Connect your energies, overlapping them. Feel them in their interconnectedness. Breathe. Breathe in, breathe out. Release. Relax. Now, push your energy out from your body just a little bit. Feel the next set of energy you bump into. It might be another person, a table, a chair, an etheric body. Whatever you feel next is just fine. Just feel it. Notice it in your awareness. Notice how it feels different from you. Now, encapsulate it. Allow your energy into it. You and this energy are no longer separate. You are not different, you are the same. Your vibrations may be different, but the base energy is the same. You are made of the same stuff, in and out. Feel your uniqueness and your similarities. Feel your connection and universal making. You are both love because that is all there is. Fear is only the absence of this knowledge. Love really is all there is. And you are that. So is everything else. Your unique personality, your unique differences do not separate you - they just offer a new and special pathway. You are truly the same being. And you always will be. Now, sit back and bring your own individual energy back to you knowing that your connection will remain even though you will go about your own day. Relax and fold yourself back into your own unique array. Breathe a few more times, releasing your preconceived notions about separation, awareness and beingness. And allow yourself to continue on a path of connectedness with everything you meet. All plants, all people, all animals, all furniture - no matter the object, they are you and of you. And you are them as well. Breathe in this knowledge and focus on your breath. And when you are ready, open your eyes into full awareness. 


  1. Though it would be difficult to obtain spiritual permission to intuit something about someone or something, sharing that spiritual realm to them is not always welcome.

    I always try and ask if they would like to know what I'm picking up on. Usually they say yes, and then it is their own choice how to receive the information.

    So consent to be separate? Unlikely? Consent to tell the person in the physical what you're picking up? That I would consider a kind gesture. Always taking into account setting, company, etc. Some things I pick up are not things I would share with others around.

    To me it seems common sense, but perhaps this is just my perception.

    Nice article! Definitely something to think about and consider.

  2. Hi, Nye! Thank you for commenting!

    I agree - many times the information we get is not always welcome, but I do believe it serves a purpose. It wouldn't have come to us otherwise. At least in my experience because I have that in my vibration. I don't want prying information or random information about people. That's overwhelming if we get every last detail. So, I set up a long time ago to just get what will help someone most. But yes, kindness is always in the mix and time and appropriate place serve an equal purpose. Helping people to receive the information in the most positive, helpful way is definitely a must for me too.